i went to a boys' school.

one of the things you learn going to a school like that, a tight-knit, private school, is how politics works, not like campaign politics where you're shaking hands and telling lies to get elected or anything like that. it's the kind of politics where you know there are certain people who aren't really fans of yours, and you even know who they are, however, you would never know it based on your actual interaction with them. when people have a problem with you, somehow you don't hear it from them, either that or you're the last person to hear about it. and if you do hear it from them, it doesn't stop there.

it's like that time a teacher overheard me say the word "ass" in the hallway. he was one of those guys that seemed to take it personally when you did something that he didn't agree with, something that upset him. i got griped out for it, which i understood, it wasn't a stellar decision on my part, and i could see how it would upset someone, and i thought that was that.

well you know how it is, that wasn't that, and i ended up on the list the next day, which i found out was for my verbal indiscretion and i ended up having to write a letter of apology for it. once more, i figure that to be the end of it. so i was a bit surprised to get a phone call at home from my wrestling coach, who never called me at home, saying that he'd heard in a meeting he was in that someone was complaining that i'd cussed out a teacher and only had to write a letter of apology for it, evidently someone wasn't finished with his blabbing. my coach just wanted to know if it was true, because it didn't sound like me, so i tell him the story, and seeing how different the truth was to what he'd heard, told me to call BS on them for spreading stuff about me that wasn't true.

i'm not bitter about it or anything, and i share that story for a couple reasons, first because i know that people have said stuff about me behind my back with regularity, people that seem to have no problem with me when i see them face to face, it's part of life and it happens to everyone, but that's the only time that i recall even having the opportunity to give someone their comeuppance over it, so i've more or less realized that there's no use getting frustrated over it or consumed with trying to clear my name, which leads to the second reason, it's happening again. i've heard from a couple different people that some are saying things about me that aren't really true and that the people talking are people who've never mentioned anything to me about it, people that are cordial to me. it's not problematic to me personally, i don't have any reason to question my own integrity and i'm not insecure enough to let it bug me, but since it's happening, it's an issue and i'm somewhat miffed by that.

the only real difference is that no one's trying to get elected.

feeling: prepared
thinking of: james
music: "pepper" butthole surfers