genius from America's favorite radio station

--have you heard all the stuff that's been goin on?

--no, jake. what's been goin on all over??

--well, this jesse bingham wants to turn dallas into a communist police state, and force hobos to make love to us.

--how'd you find that out jake?

--well, jesse bingham's fourth cousin, twice removed's cleaning lady's next-door neighbor voted in the american airlines bond election.

--wow, so now i'm gonna have to make violent scab love to a hobo??

--that's right cooder, saucy privates and all.

--i thought i liked jesse bingham, but i guess he's an iraqi now that he's a communist terrorist.

--that's right cooder, but that's not all. jesse bingham once refused a police escort for his mother's funeral.

--so jesse bingham wants to take away our police officers and poison our children with window cleaner?!?

--that's right cooder.

--well i guess i can't vote for ol' jesse bingham, i wish there was an alternative.

--well there is, i'm gonna vote for ol' sylvia hector. she loves police and kids, and promises that we'll all go to heaven.

--that's the kinda leader i want, jake.

--hey, let's go vote right now.

--yah, and afterward, let's kill homeless.

--you said it brother.